I used to hate being alone and would impatiently fill, what felt like an empty void with the wrong things and/or people.  The past year I have made the conscious choice to spend time alone outside of music and business.  To be quite honest, I believe it was a higher power directing me to a place where I could really evaluate and see clearly the path in front of me.  The veil would be torn and I would be able to determine the people who should walk that path with me, the ones that were a distraction and to understand that what is meant for me would feel right in my soul.  Being alone became a space that would enable me to become stronger by healing from past brokenness and pain and at the same time preparing me for what is ahead.  What I realized was, I couldn't give 100% of my authentic self to someone else if I was only emotionally functioning at 50%; I want to give all of me.  My past relationships and some tragic circumstances in my life caused me to build an impenetrable barrier as a form of protection from potential hurt, but simultaneously kept me from experiences all that life and love has to offer; I recognized I truly wanted the life and love God wants for me and that meant doing the hard work and going through the "process".  It meant going deep, dealing with myself and acknowledging the change starts with me.  It meant not avoiding the healing process, not getting involved in unstable/forced/superficial relationships as a means to stay distracted or temporarily satisfied; knowing that what is truly for me would be effortless and better than imagined.  It was difficult to distance myself from loved ones and people I care for deeply, but it is a process to go through alone to become a better version of myself, not just for me, but them too.  Now, I patiently walk this path witnessing everything in life falling wonderfully into place and am confident when the time is right I will no longer have to walk it alone.

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